facts-i-just-made-up:

Scenes from L.A.’s growing magician problem.
12-19-12, Los Angeles. New graffiti was found at L.A.’s George Carlin High School today marking a new height in the occult graffiti epidemic that plagues the city.  Said L.A. Police Commissioner Crowley, “They say the chalk washes away but that’s not the problem here.  The issue is that these sigils are made by amateur occultists who don’t always know what they’re doing.  They mean to mark their ethereal turf but several of these alignments are capable of awakening Samael.”
Samael, last seen slaughtering the first born sons of Egypt, could not be reached for comment.  We at FIMJU wanted more expert testimony however so we invited the mummified head of Necromancer John Dee from its tomb in England for an interview. Said the archetypical wizard, “Where am I?  Why hast thou awakened me? Oh how I long to return to the sweet embrace of death, for my every moment awake is an eternity of pain!”
Troubling words indeed.

facts-i-just-made-up:

Scenes from L.A.’s growing magician problem.

12-19-12, Los Angeles. New graffiti was found at L.A.’s George Carlin High School today marking a new height in the occult graffiti epidemic that plagues the city.  Said L.A. Police Commissioner Crowley, “They say the chalk washes away but that’s not the problem here.  The issue is that these sigils are made by amateur occultists who don’t always know what they’re doing.  They mean to mark their ethereal turf but several of these alignments are capable of awakening Samael.”

Samael, last seen slaughtering the first born sons of Egypt, could not be reached for comment.  We at FIMJU wanted more expert testimony however so we invited the mummified head of Necromancer John Dee from its tomb in England for an interview. Said the archetypical wizard, “Where am I?  Why hast thou awakened me? Oh how I long to return to the sweet embrace of death, for my every moment awake is an eternity of pain!”

Troubling words indeed.

lioness-of-the-leaf:

yeah-youtubers:

This sign is in my doctors office above the scale and I really love it. It actually made me feel a lot better after reading it

Reblogging to make this a thing in all places that have human weight scales.

lioness-of-the-leaf:

yeah-youtubers:

This sign is in my doctors office above the scale and I really love it. It actually made me feel a lot better after reading it

Reblogging to make this a thing in all places that have human weight scales.

dorkly:

zeico:

skip-rope-intestines:

WHAT HAVE YOU DONE

Don’t worry it’s docile. 

10 Times Pokemon and Tumblr Protected the World From Devastation

To see more Pokemon/tumblr goodness, click here!

smoke-thc-drop-lsd:

YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

smoke-thc-drop-lsd:

YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

swampgallows:

wooliest:

?????

this is the most Acme image i’ve seen in my life

swampgallows:

wooliest:

?????

this is the most Acme image i’ve seen in my life

wighthound:

luvzi12:

This sign is supposed to show you which things are forbidden. But it just creates the coolest dog ever


fuck u i don’t do what u tell me

wighthound:

luvzi12:

This sign is supposed to show you which things are forbidden. But it just creates the coolest dog ever

fuck u i don’t do what u tell me

kacilady:

assbutt-in-the-garrison:

mysoulhasgrowndeep-liketherivers:

2damnfeisty:

imnotkanyewest:

OKAY. OKAY. WHAT THE UNHOLY HELL. OH GOD I’M SO MAD. HANG ON LOOK, KEEP READING THIS AND I PROMISE I’LL BE MORE CALM.

In 2012, a 17-year-old boy named T.J. Lane killed three fellow classmates in a school shooting, and was sentenced to life in jail. But wait, that’s not the worst part. This kid pulled a few nasty stunts to really show how much of a pathetic monstrosity he is. In the courtroom during his trial, he took off his more formal clothing to reveal a white undershirt with the word “KILLER” crudely written on it. He was smiling and laughing while the case progressed through the day. And to top it off, when he was finally sentenced [to life in prison], he turned to the families of the victims he killed, and said, “This hand that pulled the trigger that killed your sons now masturbates to the memory. F—- all of you,” before flicking them off. As if this sick waste of human life couldn’t get any more disgusting.

AND NOW, FOR THE DAMN KICKER: This vile animal has somehow managed to fucking escape prison with a fellow inmate, and is currently on the run. I urge any and all of you to spread this info around and be fully aware of the tragedy this vermin has caused. He must be found and apprehended as soon as possible, and if I’ve made anyone more aware, I’ve helped this cause.

I WANT HIM OFF THE STREETS AND AWAY FROM EVERY OTHER HUMAN BEING. YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND HOW INFURIATED I AM. I APOLOGIZE FOR ANY OBSCENE LANGUAGE BUT I’M PISSED OFF AT THE AMERICAN JUSTICE SYSTEM AND THIS IS ONLY ANOTHER NAIL IN THE COFFIN.

he still breathing meanwhile Mike Brown is dead.

WHAT THE FUCK THIS I’M STAYING MY ASS IN THE HOUSE NEXT TO THE GUN UNTIL THEY CATCH HIM

Catch him? If I see him, he better look out. Bastard better hide himself good cuz I assure you there are probably a large number of everyday civilians just hoping he shows himself so they can kill him. He’s the one in danger being out of his cell lol.

Lol. I like this guy.